Blame COVID or our generation’s collective sense of angst, but in recent years, a new way of flirting has quietly crept in: liking your crush’s story on Instagram. Having become the new textbook method to show interest, today’s subtle code for “I’m into you” is, despite its innocence, starting to feel a little too passive, creating an endless loop of silent signals that never quite make it past the screen.
In the good old days, people had to shoot their shot in public, forcing themselves to take risks, handle rejection, and hope for the best. There were no dating apps or social media profiles to curate— just raw, unfiltered interactions where vulnerability was inevitable and the outcome uncertain.
Today though, stumbling across your Romeo, or Juliet, requires more tapping than actual talking. Over the past decade, social norms have driven shyness into the safety of screens, where a few notifications can create the illusion of a flirty connection. There was once a time when you could test mutual attraction by engaging with an old post— a like or comment was often a subtle green light, an unspoken invitation to slide into their DMs. But both techniques have since faded into obscurity, making way for a lazier form of seduction to prevail: sending a cheeky heart on a story.
A tad more discreet than liking someone’s post— as it’s only visible to the person themselves rather than their entire follower count— it feels like a safer, less confrontational way to suggest that you’re interested. Somehow managing to build tension between you and them, this small gesture, as quiet as it is, does eventually create a sense of intimacy, while sadly leaving things in limbo— forever.
flirting with an actor who doesnt know me by liking his ig stories
— rose ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪ (@cozyheard) November 30, 2024
With both parties too hesitant to make the first move, you ultimately end up second-guessing every little tap and swipe. That little heart floating around whenever you open your Story—is that a sign of affection or a slip of the finger? Did they watch your story because they like you, or were they just passing time? Have they picked up on the hint or are you just delulu? As you’re asking yourself all these questions, waiting for answers, you both find yourselves twiddling your thumbs, staring idly at your phones because no one wants to appear too eager. Spoiler: you both do.
But it’s not all bad. Some might argue that it’s the attention that counts. Knowing they could make a move, and that they voluntarily chose not to gives them that little self-esteem boost they were probably after all along. Those who are already in a relationship may see it as just harmless fun— flirting without running the risk of being called a cheater. Because it isn’t really cheating, right? Or is it?
Either way, for those content by what the move offers, it’s a win-win situation: no one gets hurt and everyone stays comfortably within their own bubble of “what ifs.” But for those seeking for something more meaningful, it can quickly start feeling like a letdown. You get all the emotional rush, without any of it actually leading anywhere. Eventually, you naturally start asking yourself if that’s what you really want, and that’s the only question that should really matter.
In an era where nostalgia is practically a cultural currency, with endless stories of how our parents met, it feels like we’re missing out on something crucial: building our own stories (that aren’t the Instagram kind). Instead, we end up collecting potential partners like names on a to-do list, but never taking the leap to turn any of them into something real.
And while we’re more connected than ever, thanks to our phones, the irony is hard to ignore. The internet promises to bring us closer, yet in reality, it’s pushing us further apart. We scroll, we tap, we send hearts, but somehow, it all feels hollow. And the illusion of intimacy created by apps is just that—an illusion—one that masks our growing distance under the guise of convenience and a much-sought after sense of connection.
Sure, striking up a conversation in real life can be nerve-wracking, and let’s face it—some moments might be awkward as hell. But those are the stories you end up sharing with your friends; the ones that make you cringe now but will crack you up later. Liking someone’s story? Doesn’t even scratch the surface. You might get a like in return, but you’re left still wondering if they’re actually someone worth getting to know.
Our advice? Get moving before it’s too late. And yes, by too late we mean before your auntie picks someone for you to settle down with.