Whether you call her teta, sety or mima, chances are your arab grandma is nothing short of witty, hilarious, and of course, endearingly old-fashioned.
Spending time with her means hours spent listening to timeless stories breaking down your family history as she attempts to stuff your face with a seven course meal in one sitting.
But if you’ve hit your mid-twenties, there’s one direction every conversation always eventually heads: marriage. You’ve probably heard the question “Why aren’t you married yet?” more often than you can recall at this point.
While it can be a nuisance, nothing is more valuable than her unsolicited dating advice. If you ever needed a little reminder, or wondered what other grandmas offer up their grandkids, we asked 7 Arab grandmas what they have to say:
To her soon-to-be-married granddaughter:
“If you give all the honey before marriage, he will go to another honey pot.”
To her newly-wed grandson:
“If you want to know how your wife will be in 20 years, look at her mom.”
To her 28-year-old granddaughter:
“Keep a few men on rotation then pick the one that pisses you off the least.”
To her grandson who can’t seem to find the one:
“If you meet a good man, marry his sister.”
To her newly-wed granddaughter:
“If he gets used to being lazy in the first months, you won’t ever be able to change it.”
To her imprudent 24-year-old grandson:
“Don’t be fooled by a woman’s beauty, even oleander flowers taste bitter.”
To her grandson dealing with trust issues:
“Don’t be afraid of loud women, it’s the quiet ones plotting behind your back.”